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Parenting Behavior Modification Plan Example
By Kelly Nault

When it comes to learning how to adapt behavior, a “behavior modification plan example” is the only way to go! But before we look at an example, let’s go over the fundamental basics of how to successfully modify behavior in children.

 

Why Do Kids Misbehave?
 

It is important to know that children always behave in a way (even in an annoying way) because it serves them. How does misbehavior serve a child? Great question.
 

Misbehavior can either:
 

  1. Provide children with attention (negative attention is better than none at all), or

  2. Get children their way. 
     

How Do We Change The Way Our Children Behave?
 

Change needs to start with you. Why? Because you are the only person you can truly change. Fortunately, we can inspire children to change by modifying our reaction to their misbehavior. The key is to dissolve the pay-off they are currently receiving for their misbehavior and to increase the pay-offs they receive for positive behavior.

 

To modify behavior, you need to have a parenting plan that includes:
 

  1. Finding your child’s “buy in” (the reason they would want to change),

  2. Disciplining with joy, and

  3. Following through consistently.
     

Changing children’s behaviors for the better is possible when you are consistent. Since you want your kids to change their misbehavior permanently, you need to prove to them that you mean business and are committed to a new way of doing things. The great news is that generally after a week or two of being consistent, children will trust your follow-through enough to change themselves. At this point, you have lift off. You have mastered the secret of changing behavior and maintaining the change with your children!
 

Now let’s go over a behavior modification plan example.

 

Sample Parenting Misbehavior Modification Plan



Misbehavior to Solve: Grant dawdles in the morning and makes his older brother Graham late for school. *Special note: both brothers are blind.
 

Parenting Plan of Action: To leave at 8:00AM sharp and not wait for Grant if he's late (since he is old enough to stay on his own).
 

Applying the Parenting Plan: Excerpt from diary.
 

"Yesterday morning, 7:52 a.m. came and they were both rushing around … 7:55 Graham is getting his coat on. 7:58 Graham is out the door waiting and no Grant. I had made myself a promise to follow through.
 

When my watch turned 8 a.m. I took a big gulp and left with Graham as Grant screamed from the front door: “GET BACK HERE! I’M READY TO GO! COME BACK NOW!!!” Graham was delighted with his special time with me. But I was freaking out. Even though Grant was of the age to be left alone, all I could think about was what I would say to the cops if Grant called them like he had threatened. I saw the headlines: "CAREGIVER NEGLECTS BLIND CHILD, SENTENCED TO 6 MONTHS IN PRISON".
 

Relieved, I returned to the house without a police car in sight. I opened the door to find Grant sitting in a heap no more ready than he was at 8a.m. I told him, “When you are ready to leave, let me know and I will be happy to take you.” That’s when the debate started: “You didn’t help me find my homework! My watch said 7:55 a.m.” I wanted to lash back, but I didn’t. Instead I pulled out something more powerful—the vacuum. And vacuum I did, with a couple of, “Sorry Grant can’t hear you! When you’re ready to go, let me know.” It wasn’t until 10:45 a.m. that he was ready. His motivation? He realized he was missing recess! We did have a good time walking to school. But the best part … today he was on time!"


Consistent change in your parenting reaction to their behavior can inspire great change in your children—it’s just a simple matter of being firm and following through.
 

*************************************************************************
 Kelly Nault, MA award winning parenting author of When You’re About To Go Off The Deep End, Don’t Take Your Kids With You inspires moms to put themselves first—for the sake of their children. She shares time-tested tools that motivate children to want to be well behaved, responsible and happy! Sign up for her free online parenting course here.

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